Tumhe Dillagi : Part 6

 

Tumhen dil lagi bhool jani padegi

Part 6

Reality Check

Jo ulfat mein har ek sitam hai gawara 

Yeh sab kuch hai paas-e-wafa tumse warna Sataatey ho din raat jis tarah mujh ko 

Kisi ghair ko yun sataakar to dekho

( please start with part 1. This is part 6 of 7.)

Jo =That

ulfat = love

mein = in

har ek = every

sitam = offense

hai = is

gawara = acceptable , tolerated Yeh = this

sab kuch = everything

hai = this

paas-e-wafa = fidelity, loyalty and respect in love

tumse = towards you

warna = or else Sataatey = harass

ho = you

din raat = day and night, constantly

jis tarah = which way

mujh ko = me Kisi = some

ghair = stranger, other person

Ko= to

yun = this manner

sataakar = harass

to = just, simply

dekho = see

As discussed in the previous verse, often an intimate relationship serves as a haven for catharsis of pent up negative emotions. Here the partner who is at the receiving end of the negativity or hardship is making his voice heard. The fact that he is tolerating every offense from his loved one is not to be mistaken as his weakness. By virtue of fidelity it is a show of strength. It is the unflinching respect born out of love that makes him accept every unkind word and disregard shown to him. He challenges his partner/ lover to try using similar attitude with another person to see how well or not it would sit with them. Indirectly he is giving an insight to the partner that it was ok to vent your feelings in my presence because you felt closeness to me but let it not be forgotten that I deserve to be loved and respected the way I treat you. 

This verse effortlessly underlines the foundations and perils of a relationship based on intimacy. How much unloading is healthy and how too much can do irreversible damage and threaten mutual respect. As much as it is true that the maturity of one partner to understand the underlying stress and thereby accept another’s mistreatment sustains the relationship through difficult periods, it is equally important that he asserts his position and calls out the wrong at some point. Without such timely assertion tolerance can be misconstrued as weakness and stupidity. A reality check for the erring partner is absolutely essential if the relationship has to thrive. Ironically if this reality check is not offered, the suffering partner inadvertently shares a responsibility in his partner’s deviant behavior. 

Sataatey ho din raat jis tarah mujh ko

When a person does wrong he/she causes pain to the God consciousness within. An unkind word, stealing, lying, deceiving, physically or emotionally abusing someone may occasionally go unnoticed yet they hurt one’s conscience even if they are not aware of it. Being unhappy, not content with anything you have, feeling worthless, causes pain to a caring parent and to the God within who wants his child or beloved person to be happy . We don’t even realize in how many ways each day we hurt God and those who love us. What we do to HIM and them, we wouldn’t fully dare to do to people around us because those people will not be as patient or understanding with us. 

Kisi ghair ko yun sataakar to dekho 

This verse prompts us to pause for a moment and think about this and value the love of God and people who love us unconditionally. 

Spiritually awake individuals recognize that the expression of love between two entities is the expression of the divine towards the divine. Those who express unconditional love to others are blessed to have the ability to express that love even though they may not be aware that it is a divine play. Those who are lucky to receive such love from these kind souls must learn to have gratitude in their hearts for it. It is a rare gift to receive. Once you learn to value it, you are unlikely to hurt the people who love you, whether knowingly or unknowingly. Recognition of genuine love is the most primitive introduction to the expression of the divine.

Saree is a linen weave in grayish blue with Soof embroidery on it.