Kuchh Dil Ne Kaha

 

Hindi cinema in the 60s and 70s had some gems that told simple stories in such charming ways that they felt like a peacock feather brushed against the face. Just one gentle stroke and you could hold on to the memory of the subtle experience for a long long time. One such sublime cinematic masterpiece was Anupama made in 1966. Directed by the famed director Hrishikesh Mukherjee the movie paired two good looking and talented actors in the lead, Dharmendra and Sharmila Tagore. If the story, direction and cast weren’t enough to give you enough satisfaction, you could turn to the songs in the movie and come out with an enriched soul like never before. Deeply meaningful lyrics from Kaifi Azmi and the soulful music by Hemant Kumar had their own power to attain immortality even without the storyline. When I first watched the movie on television as a teenager what had left a mark on my memory was the scene of a lesser known actress Surekha Pandit singing Dheere dheere machal sitting at the piano while her on-screen husband Tarun Bose gazed at her lovingly as if the only things that mattered in the world was her. Like most of the popular songs of those times sung by Lata Didi this song instantly became memorized in my head and one would catch me humming or singing it frequently. 

Much much later in life did I pay attention to the other beautiful song from the movie Kuch dil ne kaha. One needn’t and shouldn’t compare apples and oranges. Although both songs were penned by the same lyricist, set to tune by the same composer, and rendered by the same divine voice, each had its own distinct aura. Dheere dheere machal expresses love with a gentle tremulousness that accompanies anticipation of the arrival of the beloved and the playfulness in the heart of the lady love to test his ability to woo her when she feigns displeasure. At the heart of its lyrics that song carries a bounce, a spring in the steps, and joy of a reciprocated affection.

In contrast, kuch dil ne kaha carries a burden in its heart. It carries a storm inside that, ironically, hesitates to show the slightest presence outside. It is scared to even ruffle a leaf. When I was able to grasp the sentiment of this song I was able to appreciate the genius of the poet for his ability to express the complex emotions with such natural ease in those words. The genius of the music composer couldn’t go unnoticed either. The ultimate softness, that the suppressed aspirations of the protagonist called for, was so beautifully imbued into the melody of the song, no one could have done it more perfectly. And the intelligence of Lata Didi along with her ethereal voice was the natural choice for the ultimate expression of this masterpiece. 

The lead actors on whom the song is picturized can display emotions through their graceful and talented acting, and reviewers like me who employ words to express the sentiments and hidden truths in the lyrics, can try sincerely to give it further expression, but really none of these add any further value to the experience of the song as presented in its audio form. When you listen to it, once never proves enough. You go back and listen. Again. And again. And again. And yet it doesn’t cease to haunt.

The movie was about the young woman whose mother died during childbirth. Not only the tragedy made her motherless at birth but her father too shunned her emotionally because he found it easy to blame the loss of his beloved wife on this innocent child. All her life she became a scapegoat for his shattered dreams. Too afraid to confront him and invite his wrath she grew up in the shadows. Until she met a man who treated her with warmth and love. She began to realize that her mind could dream about a future that was much different from her past. She experienced love and hope in her heart. But life circumstances had subdued her ability to express her feelings unlike most people around her. 

kuchh dil ne kahaa, kuchh bhi nahin

kuch dil ne suna, kuch bhi nahin……

aisi bhi baatein hoti hain
aise bhi baatein hoti hain
kuchh dil ne kahaa, kuchh bhi nahin

My heart whispered something! What was it?

I heard something deep in my heart. What was it?

Oh no, nothing at all! 

She can hear a voice within herself. But silences it immediately. Dismisses it promptly.

 

Then acknowledges to herself, that perhaps not many people would be aware of such strange conversations, where the heart tries to say something, yet never gets a chance to express it aloud to anyone but oneself. Conversations that are best kept to oneself. They are not meant for sharing with another person. 

Not being able to express does not mean the person has no voice within himself or herself. 

letaa hai dil angdaaiyaan, iss dil ko samajhaaye koi
armaan naa aankhen khol dein, ruswaa naa ho jaaye koi
palkon ki thandi sej par, sapnon ki pariyaan soti hain
aisi bhi baatein hoti hain
aise bhi baatein hoti hain
kuchh dil ne kahaa, kuchh bhi nahin

She can witness her heart is yearning for love. Her as-yet -sleeping desires are slowly being aroused. Yet she is too scared to permit her heart to dream. Asks worriedly if someone can counsel the crazy heart and convince it that being desirous of joys and a life filled with love may be preposterous. She is scared asking for simple things like affection may invite the wrath of the domineering people under who she lives. 

 dil ki tasalli ke liye, jhoothi chamak jhootha nikhaar
jeewan to soonaa hi rahaa, sab samjhe aayi hai bahaar
kaliyon se koi poochhtaa, hansti hain wo yaa roti hain

She laments about the outward show of dressing and grooming she has participated in just to please her family and adhere to social norms and etiquette, without trace of personal joy in such things. Her loneliness remains unidentified by the world and only known to herself.The outward appearance succeeds in fooling other people into believing that she is happy in her life. Nobody seems to spare time to check on another person’s happiness. Like people observing blossoms rejoice in the spirit of springtime. Their own joy is intoxicating them. They move about without ascertaining if the flowers are genuinely happy or outwardly putting on a show of happiness. Alas, who has time to check on these young budding flowers?

aisi bhi baatein hoti hain
aise bhi baatein hoti hain
kuchh dil ne kahaa, kuchh bhi nahin
kuch dil ne sunaa, kuch bhi nahin

How would they know about conversations that never leave the chambers of the heart?

The past weekend I was driving long distance, returning home after attending a wedding. My mind was wandering over nonspecific topics, connecting some spiritual lessons learned in recent weeks and connecting them to realities of life. If everything is a manifestation of divinity and I pledge love to that divine presence have I been a friend to all the people who have come into my life? A few examples popped up where things have not proved as frictionless as most others. One person with whom I shared a close friendship during my years of residency one fine day abruptly shut down communication with me without providing any reason. I made many attempts to reach out and connect again. She never responded. It was a shut door. 

Then there were some others where communication was withdrawn when we could no longer see eye to eye with respect to ideology. They had agendas that I couldn’t endorse and they had no other topics to discuss with me other than their agendas or without inserting their agendas into any discussion. 

As I was thinking about these people, the song I discussed above came to mind out of the blue. In that instant I realized that in the circumstances where communication froze up with the few people I mentioned, close observation reveals that it wasn’t a case of no conversation. There was no longer a conversation with them through conventional channels. But we probably never could get each other out of our heads completely. A conversation has continued through the silence. I was able to acknowledge that they remain dear to me even though there remains nothing in common to talk about. I still feel the concern and hope that wherever they are, they are happy in their world. That they are doing well. May be they think of me and feel the same way. Even if they hold any grudge they must be talking to me under the pretext of that grudge. 

Aisi bhi baatein hoti hain 

Aise bhi baatein hoti hain

Kuch dil ne kaha

Kuch bhi nahi

Kuch dil ne suna

Kuch bhi nahi

Why just the people who are alive and no longer speaking to me? I have conversations in my heart with God at every moment of my wakeful day. I have conversations frequently with my dad. I have conversations from time to time with my teachers, elders, brother, friends who are no more in the physical world. 

The planes of reality vary. But they all come under the umbrella of a single unified reality. An emotion, a word can connect any two points within that reality to each other. I keep asking God for the emotion of love and that what I get. I may not be perfect. May never be. But my heart can’t silence its chatter. Its voice may not always reach outside but it never stops talking to everyone it knows. And everyone it doesn’t know. 

What it is beginning to learn, slowly but surely, is to listen to those voices that don’t always utter audible sounds. 

At a recent meeting of interfaith groups I heard a wonderful comment from a Native American community leader. He spoke about how since early childhood his grandmother would insist on him to be a better listener. The community traditionally emphasized on actually listening to the hummingbirds and other birds in the surroundings. Every living being has a song of its own. That’s their deep belief. By focusing on the art of listening they learn to tune into other beings and live in harmony. The man had shared such a profound lesson to me. 

Kaifi Azmi saheb’s poetry is now speaking to me in many more ways than I had initially imagined. 

Aisi bhi baatein hoti hain ……

Conversations occur in many different ways. Our maturity on moral, ethical and spiritual levels is as important as the maturity at physical and mental levels to be able to participate in all kinds of conversations. 

Conversations are critical for learning and growth. This topic is sure to come up again in future posts. Because there is no bottom to the topic of language and communication. 

A silk cotton Maheshwari saree with intricate bandhani work.