Meeting Fellow Humans

Meeting Fellow Humans:

Life Stories of Strangers:

Mom, Abhay and I had arrived at Denver airport from Bakersfield on a very early morning flight on Friday. Mom needs wheelchair assistance. A young man, probably in his 20s, was there within minutes of us getting off the aircraft. He made mom sit in his wheelchair. Then picked one of our bags and put it under the chair. A canvas duffle I was carrying, he insisted to take that as well and tucked it into one of the handrails of the wheelchair. He tucked her folding walker in front of her. And we started following him to the baggage claim area. He had the presence of mind to ask me if we needed to use the restroom. I was happy to use one right away. He waited patiently for us. We then took the airport train to the main terminal which housed the baggage claim. Once our checked-in baggage arrived on the carousel, he again took one of the bags and pulled it with one hand while pushing the wheelchair with the other hand. We were outside the terminal at the waiting area for passenger pick up by ride apps like Uber or Lyft. Instead of simply making us get off there he looked around, found a vacant bench at a distance, walked us there and made mom first take a seat on the bench. Then unloaded all our stuff from the wheelchair before taking leave of us. 

During that short walk together from our arrival gate to the bench I had struck up a conversation as I tend to do. I had asked him “ are you from Ethiopia?”. He nodded with a yes. He looked like he was in his mid to late twenties. How long have you been in this country? 1 year. Just a year since leaving his homeland and working as a porter/wheelchair assistant at the airport for a living, this young man had come here for a better future. From everything I had observed in the short time with him, he was mature beyond his years. He had paid attention to every detail to make our lives easier. Bathroom needs? Carrying the luggage that he wasn’t required to. Showing understanding and patience at every step, just through body language, without needing to say a word. I could only pray and hope that this man’s special qualities will not go unnoticed and unrewarded. That he will be valued for everything he potentially contributes to this country and not how he looks and how his image fits into the mainstream culture.

Next was my job to find a uber ride. Our final destination was Breckenridge which is nearly 2-2.5 hours from Denver. On the way we needed to stop for breakfast/ brunch. I got in touch with my sister who was driving from Dallas to meet us in Breckenridge. She said she would send me the link for a convenient place on the way to stop for brunch and groceries. 

While I was waiting for her to send me that link, a van stopped in front of our bench. The driver asked if we had called the ride. I said no. She asked where we had to go. I said I don’t know yet. I’m waiting to hear from my sister. She didn’t leave the place after that. Just decided to wait till I found out. Within a minute I had received the address from my sister. The place was nearly 40 miles away. Uber app was showing $55 for the ride. I showed it to the driver. She said she could take me for $50. It did not make much fiscal sense. I asked if she could take for $40. She was ready for $45. I did finally agree. But in retrospect it seemed like an unsafe thing to take a ride from a stranger. Anyways. That thought came much too late.

We were already in her van, bag and baggage in tow. Mom and Abhay sat in the back, I sat in the front next to the driver. There was considerable traffic on the road. Again I struck up a conversation. My guess was right here as well. She too was from Ethiopia. But she was here for more than a decade. She was married. Had two kids 9 and 6 years old. She did this job as a taxi driver in the hours when her kids were at school. 

She opened up about the ride apps. Her opinion was that they “don’t do anything and still want the money”. Instead she decided to work without relying on the app to find her work. She would “fish” for her own customers. And have to pay less commission to the app company. I shared my take on the issue. The app makers had invested in it using their intelligence. The money they were asking was for their brains. It is true that perhaps they could give more to the drivers than they were making off each ride. But her claim that they don’t do anything was not completely valid. 

This led us to a further conversation about how greed is overtaking in this society. When she learned about what work I do for a living, immediately she said “ I admire the leaders in your country. They pay attention to education. In my country( Ethiopia) leaders are only engaged in fighting wars. There is nothing planned for the young generation.”

Then she told me her story. 

Her name was B ( shortened to maintain anonymity). She was nineteen, just graduated from high school when she began looking at coming to the USA. There was something called diversity visa. If a fellow countryman sponsored her she could get the visa to come here. They came to know that one man who lived in Denver was a classmate of her dad. They had not been in touch after high school and were never close friends in school. The only connection was attending school together. When her father contacted him and asked if he could sponsor her for the visa, the man agreed. But on the condition that a certain sum of money be paid to his family in Ethiopia. Accordingly her father raised that money and she got the visa.

The arrangement was that she would come to Denver and stay with the sponsor family until she found a job. She arrived around 2 pm. Nobody showed up to pick her until after 8 pm. The family went about their day as usual, stopping on their way home after closing their liquor shop. They had brought along a used mattress for her to use. Once home, they put that mattress in the hallway outside their kids’ bedroom. That’s where she would sleep and that was her space. They had a spare bedroom in the house. “But they didn’t think I was human enough to use it” she told me. There was pain and anger in that statement. 

She soon discovered that they had brought her over to babysit their kids. Without pay! This went on for 4-5 months. She would attend church on the weekend. The women at church had been seeing her regularly. One day a few reached out to find out about her. When she shared her story they knew her sponsors and knew about their selfish ways. One of these women began to help B apply to the employment agency. When the sponsor lady found out her wrath knew no bounds. She tried to control the situation by offering a small pay for the babysitting. But when B insisted on finding another job she was thrown out of the house with her baggage. She had to go find herself a place to stay. 

Those were tough times. She had to shell out the $300 her father had given her before she left Ethiopia, to pay deposit for a rental apartment. But she never looked back after that. She worked initially at the airport, just like the young man we met earlier, pushing wheelchairs and carrying passengers’s luggage. Attended some evening classes at college. Found her husband and started a family. 

She told me her experiences how immigrants are fleeced at every turn. The unfair treatment they receive even after legally being here. 

It was a true story coming from a woman who had made it this far, was working for her bread and to feed her children. To give them a better life than she had. 

I asked if she would be willing to take us all the way to Breckenridge after our brunch at the mid way destination. We exchanged numbers. She said for me to call her once we get done with eating and are ready to leave. 

The brunch place she dropped us off at was not going to open for another half hour or more. In that time I went ahead did the grocery shopping my sister had asked me to do while mom and Abhay waited with the bags outside the restaurant.  The place had opened by the time I got there with the grocery cart. We had a leisurely brunch.

When I called B to check if she was available to take us to Breckenridge she profusely apologized for being unable to. “ I’m really sorry Doctor. I will not be able to make it back on time to pick the kids from school.”

No problem, I told her, I will contact you whenever I’m in Denver.”

She replied warmly, actually stay in touch even before that. I assured her I would be happy to. She was also welcome to visit us when she was in California. She wasnt sure if ever she would make it there but liked the gesture. We said bye to each other. 

Her demeanor had changed from the initial stern, business like, to one of letting the guard off and genuine warmth. I saw her change from a taxi driver to a friend. A mother like me. A fiercely independent woman like me. One who was ready to take on the world if she had to. One who would never give up on life without putting up a good fight. The mutual respect we developed for each other was palpable without having to express in words. 

I was able to find another ride through the app and in another two hours we were home in Breckenridge.

I had met two remarkable people already. The third one, the uber driver for the last leg of our journey, must have his own story too. But language was a barrier. He couldn’t understand English very well and probably was Spanish speaking.

What I had seen is how difficult life is for many out there and the resilience they show to see better days. Not many they meet understand them. But it is hardly a necessity for living. They are very appreciative of those who can understand. Thats all. Their life remains the same even after they are understood by the few. They just keep going on…….