Kehna galat galat: Part 4

 Kehna galat galat 

Part 4:

This is where the actual ghazal begins. 

As mentioned earlier, it is a playful banter between the two partners who love each other. One is the earnest devotee, other is the perfect spiritual master. 

Qasid payam-e-khat ko dena, bahut na tool

Bas mukhtasar yeh kehna ke aankhen taras gayi hain

Kehna galat galat toh chhupana sahi sahi

Qasid kaha jo usne batana sahi sahi

क़ासिद पयाम-ए-खत को देना बहुत न तूल
बस मुख़्तसर ये कहना के आँखें तरस गईं

कहना गलत-गलत तो छुपाना सही-सही
क़ासिद कहा जो उसने बताना सही-सही

Qasid is messenger. The mystic( spiritual aspirant) is telling an intermediary to talk to his lover (God) on his behalf. But he is unsure about God’s reaction towards him. He feels nervous giving a full account of how miserable he is without God. He does not want that awkwardness to reach God’s ears. So he is instructing the messenger that uses measured words. Just convey that I am eager to see God without going into a ramble. 

Kehna galat galat

In a bid to protect me from disclosing my awkwardness don’t give all the details about how I feel and how I’m doing. Try to beat around the bush, and talk in rather vague terms instead of divulging the bare truth.

 toh chhupana sahi sahi

Be rather clever in hiding certain details. 

Qasid kaha jo usne batana sahi sahi

But be mindful that you are my messenger. Thereby, whatever you see and hear in God’s presence I want you to deliver to me with the finest details. I am eager to know how God reacted to my message, did he show concern and reciprocate my love, or did he show scorn. What did he have to say about me or convey to me. I want to know everything. Don’t hide anything from me.

The courtship between a sincere devotee and his/her deity is indeed awkward in the early phases. Although God being pure awareness can read the devotee’s mind precisely, the devotee remains unsure and anxious about what is the right thing and what is wrong when approaching God. He fears rejection. He fears failure in love.  He goes through phases of inadequacy, guilt and shame. These emotions make him less than confident to face God openly.

On one hand he wants to hide behind a self created barrier. On the other hand he is curious to see God in His full glory and learn everything he stands to learn from God. 

Yeh subah subah chehre ki rangat udi huyi

Kal raat tum kahan the batana sahi sahi

ये सुबह-सुबह चेहरे की, रंगत उड़ी हुई
कल रात तुम कहाँ थे बताना सही-सही

God being pure awareness does not miss even the slightest flicker in the mind or expression of the devotee. He knows when the attention of the devotee was distracted and diverted to objects other than the divine center. Being constantly in the divine presence is synonymous with being in the present moment. That in turn is synonymous with spiritual daylight. Lost in thought and not being available for the present moment is synonymous with spiritual night. A devotee who has enough insight into his own wandering thoughts experiences guilt and shame for that digression. And it shows on the face. 

God is in this situation playfully taking the devotee to task. Early in the morning why is your face appearing so pale? Where had you been all night? Tell me truthfully. 

Maine puccha ke kal shab kahan the

Pehle sharmaye phir hanske bolay 

Baat aisi tum kyon pucchte ho

Jo batane ke qabil nahin hain

मैंने पूछा के कल शब् कहाँ थे
पहले शरमाये फिर हँस के बोले
बात क्यों ऐसी तुम पूछते हो
जो बताने के काबिल नहीं है

This sher (verse) is purportedly mouthed by the Master who is seeking accountability. Where were you last night? 

The devotee is embarrassed by such direct questioning. But has become quite adept at circumventing such probing questions. He laughs and replies that you are asking me something that is not appropriate to be told openly. 

Kal raat tum kahan the batana sahi sahi

कल रात तुम कहाँ थे बताना सही-सही

Tell me your whereabouts from last night! 

Yeh udi udi si rangat, yeh khulay khulay se gesu 

Teri subah keh rahi hain teri shaam ka fasana 

ये उड़ी-उड़ी सी रंगत ये खुले-खुले से गेसू
तेरी सुबह कह रही है तेरी शाम का फ़साना

When the devotee fails to give an honest answer God says: your pale face and disheveled hair has not escaped my attention. Your morning is giving away your shenanigans from the night before. ( You don’t have to tell me in words if you choose not to. I can gather the truth simply by observing you.)

Kal raat tum kahan the batana sahi sahi कल रात तुम कहाँ थे बताना सही-सही

Tell me truthfully where you had been last night?

The pressure of flawless behavior can get overwhelming for even the best spiritual follower from time to time. Although taken to task frequently over defections, God knows when to ease the tension. 

Na hum samjhe na tum aaye kahin se

Paseena poncchiye apni jabeen se

न हम समझे न तुम आये कहीं से
पसीना पोंछिये अपनी जबीं से

Thus God forgives and makes bygones be bygones. Forget about it. Saying this he lightheartedly tries to put the devotee at ease. Neither did I gather anything nor did you wander and return from anywhere. Wipe that sweat off your forehead and just relax. 

( Left unsaid here is that, although you made a mistake and I caught you doing something that you shouldn’t have done, I hope you learned from that mistake. You are expected to be more careful going forward.)

This entire section talks about human tendency to sway from dedicated living from time to time and the accountability he owes towards pure conscience. It shines a light on the tendency for the mind to become evasive when made to answer for those errant thoughts or behaviors. And why allowing grace after such incidents becomes necessary to make progress and learn from past mistakes rather than allow them to cripple you.

Kal raat tum kahan the batana sahi sahi कल रात तुम कहाँ थे बताना सही-सही

Tell me what you were up to last night when I didn’t see you around.

( Part 5 to follow)