Understanding Desire

 In the last post I shared one perspective I gained about walking past temptations with mental resolve.

The dilemma, about going forward with an experience ( indulgence) or not, does not occur with every experience. Some things just seem to proceed without hesitation, doubt, deliberation, obstruction, guilt or regret. Where the mind is at crossroads that’s where drama happens. That’s where insights come into play and most change happens. 

Desire! One can write a thesis on desire. Perhaps the most powerful phrase capturing the phenomenon of desire is “ A streetcar named Desire”, the title of the play by Tennessee Williams. Lives are made and destroyed by desire. The world would come to a standstill without desire. 

From the perspective of Duality and Non-Duality, Desire becomes a very important concept. Ordinary minds function within the domain of duality. It is always me, others and the world of living and non living objects. Desire is the force that makes me interact with everything that is perceived as not me. The desire may be positive, that is to go near that object or person or own it. It may be negative, that is to keep a distance from it or even flee from it. The power of the desire decides how emphatic my response to it will be. 

Non-duality is a whole different ballgame. Often times it is desire that becomes the key factor to make someone get drawn from a world of duality towards non-duality. Ironically, the final realization of the state of non-duality requires the dissolution of all desires, including the desire to experience that state. Yet until that final stage, desires are like hurdles in a hurdle race to be overcome one after another, from the starting point of duality to the crossing point over to non-duality. Desires are serious business that are the currency on which the economy of life between birth and death operates. The currency needs to be exhausted, even from savings accounts, to cross over to eternity. A single penny remaining in any of the accounts can detain you in the mortal cycle. 

When I was in medical school in Mumbai a large number of my classmates were making preparations for immigrating to either the USA or UK or Australia for long term residence. They studied for qualifying exams and researched programs and universities where they could apply and everything that would be required to follow their dreams. A spiritual seeker is in many ways like those people. He/she follows shama-dama (self control) and devotional practices and studies and self enquiry to reach the final liberation from mortal life. And overcoming desires becomes a key test for advancing in the process. 

What is intriguing is that from the perspective of non-duality, there is no “me” and “other”. The piece of bread with the freshly made chutney that I spoke about in the last post existed as an object only for the mind situated in the domain of duality. If it went back into the seat of non-duality, the bread would not be an object to acquire. It would be identical to the “me” and therefore not create desire in the mind. 

This brings us to the point that will power needs exertion only in the domain of duality. Weakness exists only in that domain. Incompleteness too exists only in that domain. Hence errors also exist in that domain. Any mind that recognizes errors in oneself or others should know better that forgiveness is a sign of understanding the limitations of the state of duality. 

Rising above desires is good exercise for the human spirit. It is the weaknesses that provide an incentive to overcome them. If you are still struggling to overcome your own weaknesses you should be able to understand other people’s weaknesses. Holding forgiveness in the heart is a greater triumph than overcoming personal weaknesses and desires. 

Again here Muktabai’s words ring in the mind: 

एक आपण साधू झाले ।

येर कोण वाया गेले? ॥

With every personal advancement don’t start believing that you are superior to others. You are not! As long as you identify others as separate from you, you are in the domain of duality. And you are vulnerable to imperfections in that domain. When you see yourself in the nondual domain, others are you, and therefore perfect as they are.

विश्व पट ब्रम्ह दोरा।

Or

ब्रम्ह जैसे तैशा परी।

आम्हा वेढिले भूति चारी॥

Whether we see ourselves as imperfect or perfect, everything around us is not different from us. So let humility remain at all times. 

Desires are not bad in themselves. Desires that don’t take into account the benefit of everyone drop us downwards. Desires that aim to do good to everyone uplift us more than others. So you are doing a favor to yourself when you do good to others. They needn’t thank you. You need to be grateful to them for allowing you to be of service to them. 

It’s a confusing world. Takes a while to navigate. But when you desire to find the way, there is always a light that shines through. You just need to know what to desire for. Before desire leads you astray.